The Things We All Carry

Ryan A - DC

Ryan is a firefighter in Washington, DC. His experiences with work and life demonstrate a need for a global approach to mental health. We can't only worry about the calls we need to be in tune with all aspects of life for a firefighter. Knowing what trials and tribulations a firefighter's living through and dealing with allows us as peers and leaders to better serve our people. Ryan dealt with cancer and death in an up close and personal manner. He was thrust into a caretaker role  at a point in time, he could never have imagined being necessary. He discusses the realities of caring for a loved one as cancer rages and death approaches. There are moments of beauty and grace sprinkled among the indignity of death. He doesn't pull punches when sharing the uglier side of cancer and hospice. He also shares how this experience has changed his approach at work and the reactions he has had to certain calls. Separating the  two worlds, firehouse and personal life is difficult in the best of times. However, when tragedy strikes it's damn near impossible.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

CopShrink-CA

"My purpose in life is to alleviate suffering."That's the mission statement of this week's guest. Deana, also known as CopShrink on Instagram, is a licensed marriage and family therapist in the state of California. Her focus is working with cops, firefighters and the spouses of both. In addition she responds to large-scale or significant incidents requiring CISM. In other words...she sees the first responder on their worst day. Dean has been in practice for 10 plus years and brings her own experiences of trauma and recovery as part of her toolkit. She's a rare therapist who speaks our language and has been touched by our traumas as well. Growing up, her grandfather was in law enforcement. Eventually retiring as chief of police and she was married to a cop as well. Deana shares  her personal story, as well as professional. She's open and candid about topics such as abuse, marriage, divorce, addiction, faith and recovery.   This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Mike-VA

Mike is a 15 year career firefighter and has 17 years as a paramedic. He started his career at a young age as a volunteer. He's also a husband and a father of two young children. I was scrolling through Facebook one day when I happened upon a post from a firefighter in Central Virginia. He was asking for donations to raise money for the Center of Excellence. He wasn't simply asking for money though, he was asking for sponsorship for a run he had planned. That run would take him from Central Virginia across the Potomac River to Southern Maryland up to the Center of Excellence, making it a distance of roughly 80 miles. After reading his post, I reached out and floated the idea of having him as a guest on the show. After some discussion back and forth and an hour long phone call, we settled on a day and time. Mike and I sat down together in my apartment and recorded this conversation. Mike shares his early brushes with death and trauma and how those times formed and affected him. He's open about the mistakes he's made. The alcohol he used as an escape and the road he is on towards recovery.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Bonus Episode Pop-Up on Sleep

Some of y'all might recognize this week's guest from Episode 52, as I welcome back Brad from the Eastern Shore of Maryland.Brad is a third generation firefighter with 22 years of service. He first started as a volunteer and is now approaching 18 years with his career department. Brad reached out to my request for impromptu interviews and it intrigued me since I'd already heard his life story in a previous episode we recorded. It turns out he had a new subject to discuss. He was part of the 62 Romeo sleep cohort and wants to spread the word as a sleep ambassador. Brad shares his sleep story, tips that help him, what changes he's made and a few other bits of information.Look up Episode 48 to find out even more information on 62 Romeo.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Andy Pantelis IAFF District 4 VP-MD

This week offer up my conversation with Andy Pantelis. Andy is the District Four vice-president for the IAFF. For those of you who are non-fire related listeners the IAFF is the international association of firefighters. Andy he was elected to his position in 2016 and he represented the local affiliates at Delaware, Maryland, Pennsylvania, Virginia, West Virginia, and DC. Andy is also the president of Local 1619 Prince George's county, Maryland, as well as a battalion chief in Prince George's county. He's been with his department since 1997. We spent about an hour and a half, one morning speaking via zoom. The conversation ranges from mental health to retirement, to cancer prevention, with a few other topics scattered in there. This kind of conversation is helpful, but not exhaustive. We could've spent an episode alone on each topic. Perhaps a deeper dive into a few subjects is warranted in the future. Feel free to reach out to me with any questions or comments concerning this episode or any other.     This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Ricky Nuttall - London

Ricky Nuttall is a London firefighter with one hell of a story. On June 14th, 2017, he was dispatched to a structure fire during the early morning hours. That fire turned out to be the deadliest fire in London since world war II. He joined over 250 other first responders to battle the blaze, a devastating blaze at Grenfell tower. Grenfell claimed the lives of 72 residents and injured over 70 more. Ricky shares his insights and his personal story of that night, as well as how it affected his mental health. Today, he uses that experience and his recovery in presentations to schools, fire departments, and prisons. Just to name a few. He is now a mental health advocate, focusing on raising awareness on the importance of social and workplace mental health and wellbeing. He'll be the first to tell you that he suffered from PTSD after Grenville. He was forced to make decisions that night that altered his life. Add to that childhood trauma and various other service-related traumas it combined to throw his life into a tailspin. He survived his battle with some very serious demons and he is here today to tell the story of recovery.Ricky coined the phrase, firefighters leave incidents, but incidents don't leave us. In other words.....these are the things we all carry.   This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

RyanSacMetro-CA

Welcome to Episode 71 of The Things We All Carry.It's been a couple months since I put out a call for people interested in doing an impromptu interview.This is another in that series of pop-up interviews.Ryan is a captain with SacMetro in California. He responded to my message and waited patiently as our schedule seemed to never align. Luckily we were able to sit down and record recently. Ryan shares his own story of trauma and recovery before discussing his work as a peer support coordinator in his department from deadly auto accidents to near misses on house fires we talk about how and why it affected him. Ryan also talks about his experience with EMDR as well as brain spotting.His goal with the peer support program centers on making certain other firefighters know they aren't alone and are made aware of all the resources available to them.We kind of joined this conversation as he and I are already rolling along. I never got to do my typical lead in for a guest but it seemed like the right thing at the time. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Robbie Reissue

One of the disturbing topics that Robbie and I discuss in this episode is how the insurance company is able to both deny his diagnosis of ptsd and then deny his application for life insurance based upon his diagnosis of P. T. S. D.You know that diagnosis..... they denied he had in the first place?This is but one example of how corporations treat individuals and are free to do as they please. Robbie's story should be alarming to all of us. The poor state of mental health awareness and care in our country is disturbing. It affects our country at a basal level which leads to a very universal effect.The state of our mental health care can be seen in our addiction rates, gun violence, homelessness, prison overcrowding, and so on.This conversation needs to be had and changes must be made.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Kathy-Last Call Foundation

Maya Angelou wrote in "Letter to My Daughter". "I can be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it."No person sums this up better than Kathy Crosby-Bell in 2014, Kathy experienced a tragedy that no mother should be exposed to. Her son, Michael Kennedy was killed in the line of duty. Michael a Boston firefighter was riding engine 33 on March 26th, 2014. He and Lieutenant ed Walsh were first due to a wind-driven fire in the back bay area of Boston. That fire claimed both of their lives.Kathy as a mother had every right to fall apart and have anger at the world.  In place of that. Kathy made it her goal to fight for the life safety of every firefighter. She founded the Last Call Foundation in Michael's memory. Michael and Lieutenant Walsh died in part due to a failed firehose. They never got the water they called for multiple times.Last Call started there… “Why isn't there a burn proof hose for firefighters? “That mission has now morphed into a battle with special interests and the NFPA. Kathy and Last Call have also expanded their interest into cancer detection, fighting PFAS, helping firefighters seek help for PTSD and offering grants for research in the realm of the fire service.Because Kathy refused to be reduced by the tragedy of Michael's death the entire fire service has and will benefit from her fight. I'm honored Kathy chose to share her story with me. She is a true inspiration and a testament to what we as humans can do when we harness our power and our tenacity. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Rescue_RD

I had the pleasure of speaking to Megan Lautz this week. Megan is a registered dietician and personal trainer. She works for Fairfax county here in Virginia and has her own personal practice as well. She's better known as  @rescue_RD on social media.  Megan has made it her ambition to help first responders with nutrition and the rigors of work in these jobs and shifts. According to her bio and her website."First responders face unique challenges. When it comes to health, these challenges have inspired me to create targeted realistic solutions through the life cycle of a first responders career. I thrive on translating complicated health information into manageable lifestyle changes to fit into an unpredictable shift."  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com