The Things We All Carry

JordanH - NC

I want to welcome you to episode 93 of The Things We All Carry. It blows my mind that I said 93. I'm creeping up on 100 episodes, and I didn't know where this show was going to go But coming up on 100 episodes is fantastic in my mind.Jordan Hood started as a volunteer firefighter in 2002 in Pennsylvania in a very small volunteer company. He moved on to York PA in 2008, taking a step up to about 600, 700 runs a year. Then he started applying to jobs up and down the East Coast and ended up landing in Prince George's County, Maryland in 2013.  Prince George's is a busy combination system. It's a large system, bordering D. C., and they run a lot, a lot of calls. That's kind of been the theme, each position he's done, he's brought more calls, more trauma, and more stress to his life.He ultimately left Prince George's County for a city job because he's always wanted to be a city firefighter. He's been with Charlotte, North Carolina for over five years now.  Jordan reached out to me when he listened to my episode with Mike Nasti on Tip of the Spear Leadership. Turns out that Jordan rode an engine with Mike in Prince George's County. They had  a fire which they both have spoken about. Jordan gets into that fire towards  the middle of this episode  and how it affected him and how it affected Mike and how they move forward from it. He's done a lot. He's seen a lot. He's been through a lot and he's, he's taken some ownership of everything lately. That's the best part, he's taken some ownership. He's made some changes and he's come out the other end a better person, a better husband, a better father. And a better firefighter and hopefully in the future a better leader because he's looking to move up in the ranks This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

The Angry VikingTherapist

 Today, I have the pleasure of bringing to you a gentleman who goes by the name the Angry Viking Therapist. You can find him under Dr. Trevor Wilkins on Instagram.Dr. Trevor Wilkins is a licensed professional clinical counselor and he lives in Kentucky.  He specializes in symptoms related to trauma, depression, anxiety, and post traumatic stress disorder. He works with us, this, this first responder community, the military community, high stress environments. He's been one of us. He was a volunteer firefighter, he was an EMT,  and he was a law enforcement officer for 15 years..... including a good stint with Kentucky State Police.  He had his own s**t go on in his life He switched gears, went back to school, got his master's degree, started his own practice, and then went back to school again and got his doctorate.He is a he's a fascinating individual.  He works in what we call Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy.  We get into that a little bit. It's a pioneering form of Cognitive Behavior Therapy. It's a little less, I don't know, a little less forgiving in a way.....not as pretty. It forces you to kind of think about your reaction to  antecedents and how you can change your reaction to those....and it would change the outcome quite a bit for you.  As well as working with rational emotive behavior therapy, he's also specializes in EMDR  We've talked about EMDR quite a bit and he, he makes some good points about how he works with the two and how one is more generalized one might be more specific.It was a really good conversation with a fascinating individual. Who I hope to have back on the show and we're going to talk about a few more things because we started to go down a tangent and it's worth exploring.  So you guys  settle in, listen to Dr. Trevor Wilkins, the Angry Viking Therapist. Go enjoy your Thanksgiving.Enjoy your time with family. Enjoy your time with friends. Enjoy some time off from work, hopefully. And get out there and do something for yourselves. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Curtis - KY

Episode 91Curtis reached out to me a while ago. He was in a bad spot and he wanted information. He wanted to know how he could get help if he was in a department that's not union and he wanted to get into the Center of Excellence. He didn't know how to do that and he and I went back and forth. He also went back and forth with the guys from Next Rung who run an amazing program there. If you haven't heard of them, go check them out. They do amazing work. He and I went back and forth and I just off ered some support when I could and, and some guidance when I could. Luckily it worked out for him. He found his way into the Center of Excellence as you'll hear in the show. A little background on Curtis. He's 16 years in the fire service between EMT and actual fire. He sent me a note and he said he thought he could run from the anger. However, it followed him wherever he went.  He had to see he was in trouble and he didn't do that until it was almost too late for him. As a number of my guests have said,  he just hopes that one person could get something out of this show, out of the podcast, out of his story.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

AdamL - OH

Welcome to Episode 90 of The Things We All Carry. This week I sat down with Adam from Ohio. Adam's been in the fire service a little bit over 10 years. He's been active in the union and some of that has kind of come back and bit him in the ass a little bit. He'll tell his side of that story and you kind of figure out why.Adam's a father and a husband. He has an addiction that we haven't covered yet on this show. Food has been his drug of choice  and he finally got to the point where he had to say enough is enough and he had to make some physical changes. He had to make some emotional changes and he had to make some mental changes, strengthen somethings n himself. He's done that and he's made it an amazing transformation, not only. physically but emotionally and mentally as well. He is a strong person and I don't mean that in only a physical sense, but he's a strong person for what he's done for himself and for what he's done for his family.   This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Stack on Tip of the Spear Leadership

Welcome to Episode 89 of The Things We All Carry. This is a podcast I recorded with Mike Nasti of Tip of the Spear Leadership. He was gracious enough to let me use the recording as a standalone episode for The Things We All Carry. He reached out to me to talk about mental health and how it affects leadership, especially in the fire service. I think you can apply that to leadership in general. So hopefully what you hear  is worthwhile and interesting and you can take away something from it and apply it to your own life. I want to thank Mike for being a friend and being open to having me on the show. And for being the guest on my show a couple of times, I guess this technically makes number three for him.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Kevin E - Cali

This week I welcome Kevin Easley.Kevin is out of San Diego City. He's been he's been a firefighter for 30 plus years He's coming to the end of a career. I guess you could say an illustrious career, he's seen a lot of things. He's been through a number of traumatic events. He's had victories and  he's had losses quite frankly.....and he has learned how to deal with both of those.He's learned how to almost remake himself in some ways. He's been a captain on a heavy rescue in San Diego city for the majority of his career. He's a special operations guy through and through and we talked for about two hours. It was one of those conversations where I think we both just got lost in it and we probably could have talked for a little bit longer. But I had taken up enough of his time. Maybe he'll come back on and share some more.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Charlie Collins - VA

Today's guest is Charlie Collins. Charlie is a singer songwriter out of Northern Virginia who also happens to be a firefighter. He's a firefighter in Loudoun County. He picked up the guitar recently as a way to recover and as a piece of therapy, actually.And from there, between TikTok, YouTube, friends and co-workers, his stuff got out on the internet and he was picked up by a producer in Nashville, Actually the son of Roger Miller and some of you might know who Roger Miller is. He's famous for the song King of the Road.His son found Charlie and decided he was worth recording and I have to agree with him. So the result of that recording was the EP called Undisclosed and you're going to hear some of the songs from that in today's episode and you're going to hear a couple of unreleased songsThis one was a good one. This was a fun one to do. There was a typical story of life and some traumas and some drama and then recovery. But there's also five songs mixed in and it was a little tricky for me because it's the first time I've recorded music along with a podcast.So hopefully the quality treats you right. And, and you enjoy this show as much as I did. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Alex Potter - AK

This week I had the pleasure of speaking with Alex Potter. One of the first things Alex told me when we spoke was that she always knew hers would be a travel centered life. Travel along with living and working abroad changes and enlightens, anyone who chooses to do so. You can't help, but change a little, at least a little once you're exposed and immersed in a culture other than yours. Anthony Bourdain once said:  "Travel changes you  as you move through this life and this world, you change things slightly. You leave marks behind however small. And in return life and travel leaves marks on you."Alex went to school to become a nurse. During that time she chose to study abroad. She spent time in India, Uganda, and Jordan, while working on her degree. All the while she knew she had a passion for journalism and photography. Once she graduated, nursing jobs were tough to find and she  returned to Jordan. That was the start of a career that would find her in Jordan, Yemen and Iraq. Just to name a few of the countries. Her story takes twists and turns involving revolutions invasions, wild land, firefighting, trauma nursing, and in the middle of all of it, finding love. Alex has experienced her share of trauma, death, loss, and grief.Never one to back down from a challenge, Alex has met it all head on and with her head up. Perseverance and a life fulfilled are the themes running through every aspect of her human experience.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Stephanie - Five After Midnight

"Well behaved women rarely make history" Marilyn Monroe, Eleanor Roosevelt, Anne Boleyn, even Princess Leia, you take your pick that line has been attributed to all four and more. Credit actually goes to Laurel Thatcher Ulrich, an American professor Stephanie White is trying her best to make some history. Attempting to change a culture  requires you to step on toes and irritate the keepers of the status quo. From marijuana, to PFAS, to mental health, to pregnancy in the fire service, Stephanie is championing progression and change. Her voice can be heard on the 5 After Midnight podcast and  her writings can be found in Fire Engineering.Stephanie and I spoke for a little over an hour last week. We had no planning and zero idea where this would take us. What follows is an off the cuff impromptu conversation between two voices riddled with thoughts, opinions, and ADHD.  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com

Alex-NOVA

Soren Kierkegaard wrote"The greatest hazard of all, losing oneself, can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all. No other loss can occur so quietly, any other loss, an arm, a leg, $5, a wife, et cetera, is sure to be noticed. "In our day-to-day lives it's very easy to lose ourselves and our sense of self. We are often the last to notice. Alex is a firefighter from a nearby agency and his story is just that losing himself to the job. His story is a familiar one, one wrought  with overtime, an all in culture, a mindset that tells you no one outside the service understands, the morbidity of humor, even a feeling of being better than anyone else, simply because of the work you do. It's that slow transition into defining yourself as a firefighter, not as an individual or a human working as a firefighter.Alex lost a girlfriend, nearly lost an entire set of friends, and more importantly, he lost his sense of self and turned very dark before realizing he had to change. Through therapy he's been able to make amends and changes. He's found the outlets necessary in order to not keep the experiences and emotions bottled in. He's found the way to enjoy and live life and not simply be about the barbell and a fire truck. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit thethingsweallcarry.substack.com